Informative & Thought-Provoking Posts From Around The Web – February Edition

February’s always a hot month for love with Valentine’s Day falling right in the middle. Here are a summary of posts from around the web this month that are informative and thought-provoking, covering various topics related to love and relationships. There’s something for everyone in this collection of news, articles and videos.

The History Of Marriage – Alex Gendler (A TED Talk)

“Marriage has always been shaped by society, and as a society’s structure, values and goals change over time, its ideas of marriage will continue to change along with them.” With marriage being a hotly discussed topic of late with increasing divorce rates and same-sex marriage legislation being debated by governments around the world, here is a brief history of marriage (via TED-Ed – Lessons Worth Sharing) in The History Of Marriage – Alex Gendler.

Everything You Wanted To Know About Polyamory But Were Afraid To Ask

Some of the estimated 1 million to 2 million Americans who choose to openly love more than one person share wisdom and advice for people who are considering “going poly,” or who are just curious about the practice in Everything you wanted to know about polyamory but were afraid to ask – inside the sex positive world of multiple partners.

10 Stubborn Sex Myths That Just Won’t Die, Debunked

Perhaps you’ve heard that size matters, women are naturally more bisexual than men, or that tantric sex means everlasting orgasms. The fact is, none of these things are quite true. Sex has been around forever, but we’re just starting to understand it. Lifehacker debunks 10 of the most common sex myths to set the record straight in 10 Stubborn Sex Myths That Just Won’t Die, Debunked.

Canadian Actress Ellen Page Comes Out As Gay At Time To Thrive Conference

Canadian actress Ellen Page made the brave decision to come out as gay at the Human Rights Campaign Foundation’s Time to Thrive Conference in Nevada, Las Vegas. Check out the post over at the Human Rights Campaign’s Tumblr page and watch the Juno star’s moving coming out speech below.

Facebook Offers Users 56 New Gender Options

Facebook announced this month that it will allow users to customise their gender, after consulting on the subject with gay and transgender advocacy groups. Facebook now offers users 56 new gender options and here’s what they all mean over at The Week.

In The Mood For Love (10 TED Talks On Love)

Love: it’s what makes the world go round. And also: all you need. As well as that thing, in addition to war, in which all is fair. Here, watch TED Talks about this most basic of human emotions in In The Mood For Love.

26 Of Hollywood’s Most Romantic Movie Moments In One & A Half Minutes

Watch 26 of Hollywood’s most romantic movie moments in a minute and a half in The Most Romantic Movie Moments Mashup by Fandango.

Philosophy Of Love Course On MIT’s OpenCourseWare

The MIT (Massachusetts Institute of Technology) OpenCourseWare is a web-based publication of virtually all MIT course content. OCW is open and available to the world and is a permanent MIT activity. This course,  titled ‘Philosophy of Love,’ explores the nature of love through works of philosophy, literature, film, poetry, and individual experience. It investigates the distinction among eros, philia, and agape. Students discuss ideas of love as a feeling, an action, a species of ‘knowing someone,’ or a way to give or take. Authors studied include Plato, Kant, Buber, D. H. Lawrence, Rumi, and Aristotle. Find out more and go through the course materials yourself here.

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7 Deadly Relationship Sins – What Not To Do In Love – Part 2

In the previous post, 7 Deadly Relationship Sins – What Not To Do In Love – Part 1, we examined the first three of seven deadly relationship sins, how to recognise them, and most importantly, how to keep them ruining your relationship. In this post, we examine the other four deadly relationship sins, and summarise the seven things you should avoid in your relationship to ensure that you keep love for the long haul.

4. Emotional blackmail

Emotional blackmail is when someone with whom you have a close and intimate personal relationship uses fear, guilt or obligation to manipulate you. You’ve probably heard some of the commonly used phrases before: “If you loved me, you would…”, “After all I’ve done for you…”, “I thought I meant a little more than that to you…”, “I’ve got no-one else that cares about me…” or “I wouldn’t have asked you if it wasn’t important…” Often, because of the close relationship between the two people, the perpetrator of emotional blackmail knows the victim’s insecurities, secrets and other intimate knowledge, and uses these against them to achieve their goal. By its very definition, emotional blackmail involves our emotions, which often cloud our judgement and hinder our rational thought processes. Manipulating your partner to achieve some end is not part of a strong and healthy relationship, so how can you avoid emotional blackmail or deal with it appropriately when it happens? Firstly, be aware of the signs. As Forward and Frazier describe in their book Emotional Blackmail, there are six stages: 1) a demand, 2) your resistance, 3) pressure, 4) threat(s), 5) your compliance, and 6) repetition. Victims of emotional blackmail are often insecure and have difficulty saying no to people. Having a healthy ego by learning improve your self-esteem and self-love can help prevent being a victim – and realise that sometimes its okay to say no to a request and that it doesn’t necessarily make you a bad person. Finally, make sure you try to stay in control of your emotions and judge the situation and the request rationally.

5. Lack of affection & inattentiveness

Withholding affection is a form of emotional blackmail (see above) sometimes used in relationships, but sometimes through the natural drift of a relationship, we can forget to show love for our partner in the form of affection and intimacy. In fact, remembering to express your feelings for your partner and your attraction physically is one of Find Keep Love’s 6 Secrets To Keeping Long Term Love, particularly in long term relationships where affection and intimacy require a little more effort and motivation than newer relationships. It doesn’t have to be too hard – see 10 Ways To Surprise Your Partner and Relationship Maintenance & Avoiding Relationship Ruts for some great tips on how to keep your love alive and avoid the deadly sin of lack of affection and inattentiveness.

6. Unrealistic expectations of your relationship & your partner

As described in The Natural Drift Of Relationships – Why Some Relationships Don’t Last, romantic comedies can give unrealistic expectations of your partner and your relationship when the storylines contained within aren’t treated as a form of escapism, but as realistic. Having unrealistic expectations puts unnecessary pressure on your partner to perform, making them constantly conscious of their dealings with you and making them feel like they are never good enough for you, damaging their self-esteem. These unrealistic expectations can come from a number of different sources: our past relationships and experiences, our family values, traditions and upbringing or relying on others to fill an internal void. What about your own expectations of your partner, family or close friends? Are you expecting too much? Now this isn’t advocating the lowering of your own personal standards, but thinking about your expectations rationally and realistically, and asking yourself, “Am I being fair?” After all, we’re all humans and we’re none of us perfect, and having expectations that are too high leads to disappointment and frustration, and ultimately unhealthy relationships.

7. Undermining or belittling (especially in public & including being mean)

Most of the time you should be your partner’s number one supporter and stick up for them in situations where they need an ally. This support can take various forms: physical comfort and emotional support (listening and sympathising), esteem support (expressing confidence and giving encouragement), informational support (in the form of advice or providing information) and tangible support (taking on responsibilities to assist your partner or brainstorming solutions). Every now and then, they’re in the wrong or you don’t agree with their behaviour, actions or opinions, and how you deal with this is important. This leads us to the last of the deadly relationship sins: undermining or belittling your partner, especially in public (for example, around friends or family). The strength of your relationship with your partner and how open you are with your feelings (and how thick their skin is) determines how honest you can be with your partner, particularly when you disagree. However, dealing with a disagreement by undermining a person’s sense of self-worth by constantly criticising them, belittling their abilities, and calling them names or manipulating them into following your opinion/lifestyle/behaviour is a form of abuse. Being able to disagree on things and discuss them rationally and passionately is a sign of a strong and healthy relationship. Finally, in some countries, making fun of others, including your own partner, or ‘taking the piss,’ is part of the national culture and in some circles considered a way of showing affection. You may think you’re being funny and playful, but depending on the frequency of your jokes and the sensitivity of your partner, it might not be seen as funny at all. There are plenty of other ways to show affection and be funny – and avoid any misunderstandings – without being mean to or belittling others.

Avoiding these seven deadly relationship sins – and actively practicising the 6 Secrets To Keeping Long Term Love – Part 1 and Part 2 – will make sure your relationship runs smoothly and help you keep love for the long haul. In summary:

1. Lack of communication (not listening to your partner, not communicating feelings, keeping secrets)
2. Physical or emotional cheating
3. Jealousy
4. Emotional blackmail
5. Lack of affection & inattentiveness
6. Unrealistic expectations of your relationship & your partner
7. Undermining or belittling (especially in public & including being mean)

7 Deadly Relationship Sins – What Not To Do In Love – Part 1

Every long term relationship has its ups and downs, and how we deal with difficulties in a relationship defines us as people and defines the partnership. In the next two posts, we’ll look at seven deadly relationship sins, how to recognise them, and most importantly, how to avoid them ruining your relationship.

1. Lack of communication

Lack of communication is something that one or both partners will complain about at some stage of a long term relationship and it is one of the biggest relationship killers. It can manifest itself in a number of different ways, including:

a) Not listening to your partner – one of the biggest complaints between partners and something couples therapists make a ton of money from. Learn to read the body language of your partner and gauge whether something is important to them. Properly, actively listening to your partner is one way of showing that you respect them, support them and are interested in them.

b) Not communicating feelings – your fears, hopes, dreams, insecurities, issues, and problems. People do change with time and without periodically updating your partner on your thoughts, feelings and interested, you can naturally drift apart (see The Natural Drift Of Relationships – Why Some Relationships Don’t Last). Even small issues, like for example a man leaving the toilet seat up over and over again, can build up to resentment over time and injure your relationship.

c) Keeping secrets – a cornerstone of a healthy and strong relationship is trust (see 6 Secrets To Keeping Long Term Love – Part 2), but keeping secrets and having your partner find out can make them feel untrusted and question your own trustworthiness. To build trust in your relationship, check out our post on 10 Ways To Become Trustworthy And More Trusting.

2. Physical or emotional cheating

Cheating doesn’t always have to be physical, and you can do just as much damage to a relationship, if not more, by emotionally cheating. Temptation is all around us, and with the development of the internet, smartphones and other technologies connecting us with people all around the world, there are more and more opportunities to cheat. A fling with someone else – or even mutually entertaining the thought of it – may make you feel wanted or loved (or at least lusted after), but it is masking a void or deficiency in your own relationship that you need to address. In addition, the definition of acceptable behaviour when around others outside the relationship can differ from person to person and couple to couple. Think about the things you might say or write to others, or your body language, in the context of your own partner and your own relationship. How would you feel if your partner said or did similar things to another person? When does harmless, friendly flirting become something more?

3. Jealousy

A little jealousy can be good and healthy in a relationship – it can promote protectiveness and competitiveness to care and protect both your partner and relationship from the perceived threat. It can remind you of your feelings for your partner, and it can help you to think about and understand yourself a little better. In this way, healthy jealousy acts to guard and support a relationship. But too much, too often can be a deadly relationship killer. Overly jealous people see the world through a distorted lens, losing perspective and perceiving danger where there might not be. Jealousy is a highly complex emotion and can be incredibly powerful, causing us to lose control. Jealousy can be caused by insecurity and possessiveness. It can also be caused by a fear of rejection, abandonment or loss, and it can be triggered by feelings of powerlessness or a lack of control. Overcoming jealousy isn’t an easy task, but you can start by learning to love yourself (see Part 1: Find Love. Step 1. Love Yourself) to develop self-love and self-worth, creating a healthy relationship within us. This develops self-esteem and creates a healthy ego, allowing us develop healthy and productive interpersonal relationships with others. Building trust can strengthen your relationship and help overcome jealousy.

Be sure to check out the second part of this post, 7 Deadly Relationship Sins – What Not To Do In Love – Part 2, which examines the other four deadly relationship sins. And don’t forget to read 6 Secrets To Keeping Long Term Love – Part 1 and Part 2.

Avoiding Toxic Relationships Or Leaving The One You’re In

“How many times do you need to get hurt for you to know it’s time to let go?” one questioned. “A break up is just like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself trying to fix it,” another said.

While it’s all very well receiving comforting advice in the form of deep and meaningful quotes, actions truly speak louder than words. This is why even after all is said and done, it is your actions that will truly define the type of person you really are. So who exactly are you?

Should I stay… or should I go?

While you might feel a sense of loyalty to your other half – or even to yourself to keep the relationship going –  sometimes it’s best to leave and start over. See if you can identify with these five reasons for why you should break up:

1. History repeats itself

You know those couples who break up, get back together, break up, get back together, break up – and then get back together again? It isn’t healthy to keep repeating these cycles as this not only impacts upon your relationship, it impacts upon your friends and family who have to see and hear about it. If you keep having to go repeat history, then maybe it’s time to rewrite it and meet someone new.

2. After the love has gone

Relationships change over time, and sometimes the passion or spark you once had diminishes, making you question whether you are still in love with your partner. If a relationship isn’t nurtured (see Relationship Maintenance & Avoiding Relationship Ruts), you can fall into a routine where you act no longer as lovers, but more like friends or roommates. In many cases, all the relationship needs is a “pick me up,” but sometimes it’s time to realise that the relationship has run its course – and that you should choose another course of action, too. This is all discussed in detail in The Natural Drift Of Relationships – Why Some Relationships Don’t Last.

3. When opposites don’t attract

Sure, it might be fun at first to not share mutual interests – he likes sci-fi, while you’re into documentaries, he loves red peppers when you can’t stand the taste of them, and he’s messy, while you’re obsessively clean. While it might seem like fun at first, doing something different and getting out of your comfort zone, if it gets to the point where being opposites repels either of you, then you either try to compromise or agree to disagree. Whether opposites really do attract or not is up for debate: Dating Someone Similar Or Different – Opposites Attract?

4. When the cat’s away, the mice will play

Cheating is one of the most common reasons for lovers to part ways, and naturally so. Once the damage of knowing your partner has cheated on you has hit home, and having your trust betrayed, it can be hard to let go. Learning to trust again takes time, patience and commitment – but this doesn’t just apply to the person who cheated; this can also be true in the case of the person who was cheated on. If their infidelity has hurt you to the point of no return, then leave the relationship immediately. Find Keep Love looks how to build trust in relationships in 10 Ways To Become Trustworthy And More Trusting.

5. The relationship is at a dead end

So you’ve had the honeymoon period, but then ‘the’ conversation comes up. One of you raises the subject of moving in together, along with hints of marriage, but the other person isn’t so sure. Is there any long-term potential, and do you want that, or was it only ever a brief fling? It’s best for the both of you to talk about your feelings and decide what you want from the relationship, and if either of you conclude that you don’t see any future, then enjoy the relationship for what it was and walk away. Not being on the same level and wanting the same things out of the relationship is one of the biggest relationship killers.

This post was written for Find Keep Love by Susie Francis a content writer for Select Personal Services. Susie specifically loves to write about relationships, dating and travel, but her writing skills are widespread. You can find out more about Susie on Twitter (@SusieFrancisW).

The Natural Drift Of Relationships – Why Some Relationships Don’t Last

The roles of men and women have changed in Western society over the past few decades and it’s now estimated that up to a half of all marriages end in divorce. Why has this happened? Are people more immoral than they used to be? Are modern couples not as strong-willed as ones in the past? No, divorce rates are now higher because the laws have changed, the stigma attached to a being a divorcée has been reduced, and society has placed a higher premium on individual rights. We all have a greater awareness of the fragility of life and that life really is too short to be unhappy and stick in situations that are no good for our mental and/or physical well-being. People are realising the importance of individual happiness against sticking together for some other reason (because they “said till death do us part” or to do so “for the kids” and so on) and enduring a life of unhappiness. An interesting post on the reasons for divorce can be found here, but in this post I’ll be discussing relationships that didn’t break down due to infidelity, a traumatic, life-changing or significantly stressful event, domestic violence or addiction(s).

There aren’t too many couples who aren’t madly in love when they first get married (with the exception being arranged marriages), so how does a relationship end up in such a state? People do change with time – not just physically, but their personality, likes and dislikes, and even beliefs. Think about the person you were five years ago, or even a year ago, and how much you have changed since then. The pace of modern life means these changes occur at a faster rate than ever before. If you don’t keep up to date with your partner’s thoughts, feelings and activities, you may end up loving the person they once were, and not who they’re becoming (and then feeling like you don’t know them anymore). This is one reason why couples ‘drift apart’ or feel like they ‘don’t know each other anymore,’ but is this because the relationship hasn’t been maintained properly? By maintaining your relationship (see our post on Relationship Maintenance & Avoiding Relationship Ruts) and by keeping the love strong by doing an occasional nice thing (see 10 Ways To Surprise Your Partner), your love for your partner will change dynamically with time and be continually refreshed.

Perhaps the relationship just wasn’t meant to be? People – friends, as well as lovers – come into our lives to help form new chapters of our lives, some can be brief (a seasonal love), others longer, but there are some gems that last a lifetime. Sometimes we misjudge relationships – we can hang onto the wrong person, trying as we might to make things work, or we can give up the right person prematurely. It is incredibly rare for two people to find themselves exactly on the same page.

Or perhaps you weren’t being honest from the very start? Perhaps your partner fell in love with the person you portrayed to win their affection, and not your true self. Being yourself from the outset can avoid this later on. The longer you date someone, the harder it is to fake who you really are. As someone who’s been there before, and told a white lie or two to gain someone’s interest – in the early stages of dating, meeting someone say once a week or month, you can almost be anyone you like. This reminds me of the movie There’s Something About Mary, where each of the guys vying for Mary’s attention create their own fake persona to win her over.

The proliferation of romantic movies, including romantic comedies, can also share the blame as many of these give a false sense of hope and aren’t treated as merely a form of escapism. Treating them as realistic can give unrealistic expectations of your partner and your relationship, particularly when times are tough in a relationship and the parties involved think a quick and amicable solution can be reached immediately. Hardly ever are the normal, everyday parts of the relationship portrayed in a 90 minute movie (well, it wouldn’t sell movie tickets, would it?). This topic is also covered in Romantic comedies make us ‘unrealistic about relationships’, claim scientists and Romantic Comedies Are Ruining Real Life Relationships. However, there are a few movies that do keep it real – It’s Complicated, The Change-Up (except for the switching bodies part), This Is 40, Crazy Stupid Love, and the latest release, I Give It A Year, which looks at the trials and tribulations of a newlywed couple during their first year of marriage. The trailers for these movies can be found at the end of this post.

There are also scientific explanations for why feelings seem to change with time and why we shouldn’t panic when they do, but I’ll save that discussion for another day… stay tuned for Scientific Explanations For Love (And Why Hearts Seem To Change).

Why do you think couples drift apart? If you’ve been in a long-term relationship before, did something cause your relationship to break down?

Realistic Rom Com #1: It’s Complicated

Realistic Rom Com #2: The Change-Up

Realistic Rom Com #3: This Is 40

Realistic Rom Com #4: Crazy Stupid Love

Realistic Rom Com #5: I Give It A Year

5 More Signs Someone Really Likes You

The previous post on 5 Signs Someone Really Likes You was just not long enough to cover all the signs, so here we’ll look at five more signs that someone really likes you. In addition to the five signs from the first post:

1. Their body language
2. Calling for no reason
3. Their friends know about you
4. Giving you attention
5. Occasional, subtle passive aggressive behaviour

You should also look out for the following five:

6. Telling you personal secrets
Trust is important in a close personal relationship and if someone tells you their personal secrets, they are expressing trust and confidence in you. In the same way that they want to know more about you if they really like you, they will tell you about themselves, often with more personal details than they might otherwise confide in others. Sharing secrets is one way of strengthening the bond between two people.

7. Checking you out when you’re not looking

If you catch them staring at you, and they look away, perhaps with a blush or a smile, when you notice them, this is a good sign that they like you. Tied in with sign #1 (their body language), they’ll give you lots of eye contact when engaged in conversation, and they might just check you out when you think they’re not looking. Particularly if they have limited time with you, they will spend as much time as possible looking at you because you are physically appealing to them.

8. Defending you

As with sign #4 (giving you attention), when you are in trouble of some form, they will try to help you out, and this extends to defending you when you are being personally attacked in some way or another. The usual form of this defending for both sexes is verbal, and this is even more prevalent with so many ways to communicate these days: Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, and many other social networks and media sharing sites. Our opportunities to share information have never been greater, but with this comes more bullying and attacking of others, particularly under the veil of anonymity the internet affords.

9. Complimenting & supporting you

They will attempt to make you feel good by complimenting you and supporting your endeavours. They will pay good attention to you and remember things about you. They might notice, for example, that you’ve styled your hair differently (or just had a haircut) or that you’re wearing new clothes or a new scent, and compliment you on it. They will ask about the activities in your life and the things that interest you, and support, encourage and cheer you on. They will congratulate your successes and commiserate with you when things don’t go to plan.

10. Trying hard to impress you

It might be that they dress better or change their appearance in some way to get your attention. It could be that they laugh a little too hard at a joke that, quite frankly, isn’t really that funny (particularly if, like me, you use dad jokes a little too often). They might get you a gift – with or without a reason, like a birthday or Christmas – that clearly shows they have thought a lot about what your tastes are like and what you might need or want. They might rearrange even the most hectic or inflexible of schedules, just to spend a short amount of time with you. Whichever example you think about, they are trying hard to impress you and go above and beyond the normal standards of friendship to do so.

As I wrote in the original post 5 Signs Someone Really Likes You, the more of the signs described above someone shows towards you, the higher the chance they are interested in you. And now that you know what some of the signs are, you can proactively adopt these to show those in your life who you care about, that indeed you actually do!

Can you tell whether someone really likes you or not? What gives you the best indication that someone does, in fact, like you? Share your signs with us by leaving a comment below.

5 Signs Someone Really Likes You

Sometimes it’s hard enough to know exactly what your own feelings for someone else are, let alone trying to guess how they might feel towards you. In this post, we’ll touch on a few of the signs that someone really likes you and help reduce the sleepless nights and energy wasted on wondering what might be going on in their head and heart.

1. Their body language.

Try as we might, sometimes we just can’t hide our inner feelings and desires. Someone’s body language can tell you a lot about how someone feels subconsciously (or even consciously) towards you. One of the most important cues is eye contact. When you have their attention, you’ll get good eye contact. If things aren’t going so well, you’ll find their eyes wandering elsewhere – some warning signs are checking their watch, frequently checking their phone, and checking out people other than you. If they find you particularly attractive, you might find their eyes wandering slowly over your face in a triangular movement between the eyes and mouth.

They will directly or indirectly try to reduce the distance between the two of you – by standing closer to you or moving their chair closer. Do they mirror your posture or gestures subconsciously? They are likely to face you when talking to you – with their feet, arms or hands pointed towards you – in contrast to standing sideways or away from you. It shows that they are comfortable with being close to you.

If they smile more around you, it’s a good sign that they like you (or at least find you amusing). Think about when you smile – it’s when you’re happy, content or full of good feeling. They will appear to be in a better mood around you, and as a result, they’ll smile naturally (it’s pretty hard to hide a genuine smile). They may have had a bad day and will be initially tense/upset/angry/frustrated, but they’ll seem relaxed and happy around you after a few minutes. That’s a sure sign they enjoy your company.

And finally, light touching – of the arm or shoulder, for example – is a really strong indicator that this person is attracted to you. How do they react if you make light contact with them?

2. Calling for no real reason.

They might try to get your attention by calling or texting you for seemingly trivial things. How flimsy is their excuse for calling you? They might just be calling because they want to talk to you and hear your voice, but want to make up an excuse to seem less vulnerable. They might just contact you to tell you something that happened in their day or ask you about yours.

3. Their friends know about you.

If they’re happy to introduce you to their friends, it’s a good sign they like you. If they have feelings for you, they would have confided in at least one friend about you. If he/she really likes you, they’ll give you a warm introduction (and might even brag about you) to their friends.

4. Giving you attention.

As I mentioned in my post on Modern Day Dating & Scheduling Dates, attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity, so if you have someone’s attention, it’s a sure-fire sign that they like and enjoy your company. The attention can take many forms: they might, for example, ask you a lot of genuine questions about yourself (and, in particular, if you’re single or not or whether you have a love interest yourself). This will be because they have felt some kind of attraction towards you and they’ll be interested in finding out more to see how compatible you really are.

They might prioritise you over other people and activities – or organise their own activities in such a way that the chances of meeting you increase. If you’re upset or in poor health, they might try making you feel better in some way – by visiting you (or if it’s contagious, sending you or saying something comforting). They might try offering assistance when help is needed – moving house, for example, or painting a room. Many of us have a hard time putting our feelings into words, and it’s much easier and subtler to show people how you feel and that you care about them. Actions speak louder than words, as I detailed in 10 Ways To Surprise Your Partner.

5. Occasional, subtle passive aggressive behaviour.

When someone really likes you, their behaviour can be occasionally and subtly passive aggressive. Partly because sometimes strong feelings can be confusing and hard to deal with, but also because they are invested emotionally in you. You can upset them without even knowing – it might be not returning a message for a few days or not inviting them on a night out, when they were in fact really looking forward to hearing from you or seeing you. When you really like someone, there is a tendency to over-think things and take things personally.

The more of the signs described above someone shows towards you, the higher the chance they are interested in you. In the end, it all boils down to whether or not this person gives you their time and attention. Because if you really like someone, you’ll find time to spend with them, and when you’re with them, you’ll give them all your attention.

You can read about some more signs that someone likes you, including telling you personal secrets and defending you, in our follow-up post, 5 More Signs Someone Really Likes You.

Can you tell whether someone really likes you or not? What gives you the best indication that someone does, in fact, like you?